Week 1- DONE

I have survived my first week of grad school, meaning I only have 16 more weeks until Winter Break. Some might say I shouldn't start the countdown now, but let's be real, I have a countdown for the day that I graduate. I know I haven't been updating this blog as much as it seems I should, and I wish I could say that it was because I was so busy with life, but in all honesty, it is because I didn't want to say the only things that could come to my mind about life right now.

This past week, or a little over a week, has been very hard. I think the last time I wrote about this good ole life in Kentucky was after the BBQ. After that, the week that followed consisted of job training (which was actually great) and a whole lot of Kaila complaining about being in Kentucky. I have been having a pity party for myself for a week now to anyone who will listen to me, and yesterday I decided I better get over that. It's not that I don't like Kentucky, it's just that five years here is freakin' me out.

Last week we had orientation Thursday and Friday and that is when my little life crisis began. Every question you can think of popped into my head. Why am I here? Is this really what I want to be doing? Should I move home? None of these questions, as you can tell, were very positive. So, after a few mini breakdowns for a week or so, I tried to pull myself together for my first week of classes.

This week was my first week of classes. They actually weren't too bad. Overwhelming? Yes. I am in grad school, and it lives up to the name and reputation it is given. I have tons of readings every night, assignments, meetings, a job and some volunteer stuff I am doing. Plus, I am trying to make friends so I can stop having pity parties! However, if you know me, I would rather stay busy then be sitting at home pondering life's questions. With that said, this first week was nonstop chaos, and I think that made me start to like Kentucky a little better. I have my last class in about two hours and then syllabus week is over and I start the real work, which I am already trying to get ahead on so that I do not fall behind.

Besides school I have had some great times. Last Saturday I did a 5k Mud Run with some girls in my cohort and that was awesome. Then this week I have hung out with some great friends and then last night went to Waterfront Wednesday. It is like a mini concert on the lawn and it was really fun to see the great stuff Louisville has to offer. Tonight is a Zombie Walk Bar Crawl so a few of us are going to go people watch at that. Then this weekend is work and time to buckle down on homework and get ahead. Life is getting hectic, which for me means getting a little easier to be here, day by day.

Busy Bee

It seems that the only time I am sad and realize how far away I am from everyone is when I have free time. So, of course, like the rest of my life I have packed it full with things to do. I started working at the gym and that is going great, I love the job and the people I am with. I have offered to volunteer helping with Spalding Women's Basketball. I am not sure what I will be doing, but am willing to be involved with basketball anyway I can. I miss it, who woulda thought. I start my classes on Monday and my graduate assistance work on this Wednesday. And who would have guessed, I finally made friends! Needless to say I am trying to stay as busy as possible so it leaves as little free time as possible to let my mind wonder. When I am doing these things and surrounding myself with people I actually begin to think I could like it here.

Last Sunday my cohort had a BBQ to give everyone a chance to meet each other before orientation. It was so fun! I love my cohort and I really think we are a good group that could have some fun in the years to come. One of my friends in my class even invited me over after my first day of work and made me dinner (amazing seasoned potatoes, stuffed chicken, salad and HOMEMADE apple pie!!). I am beginning to feel more comfortable, but there still are those times when the thought creeps up that I am 3,000 miles away from everything for 5 years. Then I want to have a break down haha. But I am staying busy and positive and making the best of this and hopefully the time will just fly by.

Things Are Looking Up

I have a lot of goals for myself while I'm in Kentucky. If you talk to me outside of this blog I know you have heard this a hundred times, but that is the best way I know how to explain my mindset right now. I am in no way trying to be selfish, or a loner for that matter (I hate being lonely!) but I want to work on myself and my goals for the next 5 years so that when I graduate from Spalding I am not only Dr. Kaila Smith :) but I also have grown in other areas of my life.

My main goals are:
1. My Fitness. This has always been important to me, but I feel dedicated more than ever. I want fitness to become a big part of my life, not only for my body, but so I feel good. When I am active I am always more positive and I could use all the positivity I could get being in a graduate program!
2. Make Connections- This is important for me to have a future career in many areas. Now is the time to make connections with people. I may not be able to have a dream career right now, but I will soon and these connections will come in handy!
3. Become Financially Stable - well as much as I can while being a student. This is why I want to have a job and work as much on my free time as I can. I want to come out of school somewhat on my feet, not falling on my face. And I want to be able to have fun (and sometimes fun costs money) while I'm out here. Visit other states, fly home if I want, go on adventures! The fun stuff!
4. Learn New Things I've Always Wanted To Try- Fishing, Hunting, Kayaking, Concealed Weapons License! Look at all the fun stuff I can do! I don't want anything holding me back. Now is the time to do it all. That way when I get back to San Diego I already am a pro and can take my dad fishing and hunting and show him up! (I wish).
5. Enjoy My Me Time- This means if I want to relax, I can. If I want to go on adventures, I can. If I want to learn new things, I will. I guess this applies to #4, but I want nothing to hold me back. That means if one day I just want to sleep all day, heck, I will! Indiana is across a river. Ohio is somewhere close like that, Tennesse is a short drive and, well, I'm still learning the others states. But if I want to go to a different state every weekend, I will! What better time than when you're 22 and in a doctoral program.
6. Oh ya- Get My Degree- I guess I just see this happening along the way...accompanied by many sleepless nights, coffees, redbulls, mini breakdowns, and friend making. This is the ultimate reason I am in Kentucky. Don't get me wrong, getting this degree will be no easy task, but I've always kind of liked school, and always done better when I'm busy. I think after 5 years of striving for all my other fun goals I'll be like oh ya, I got my degree, I'm a freakin' psychologist. Whoa.

I'm sure there will be many more goals to come, but this is where I'm at---Day 6 in Kentucky. I'm going to focus on enjoying my time here by accomplishing goals for myself. Yes, I will probably be busy, but I wouldn't have it any other way.

I am already on my way to accomplishing my goals. I have a job, and a possible opportunity to move up in the company if I stick with it. I have a possible coaching opportunity within the next year, which is like a dream come true. I have many places around me where I can try new activities, and many people to help teach me! And I start my PsyD program next Monday!!

It's all about making the best of the situation you are in.

Good News Alert

As I'm sure most of you could tell from my previous post, I am liking Louisville, but finding it hard at the same time. Well today was great! Good news came! I had an interview this morning and later in the day I was hired! The job is at a local gym, which I think is perfect for me!

Besides that great news, I spent the day with my dad, just hanging out. I couldn't think of anything I would have rather done. We had so much fun. We took care of some errands and then went and looked at a mall and shopped around. Later we went to Cabela's and spent so much time there. Obviously Cabela's is a great place for father-daughter bonding with my dad and I. We had a great time looking at all the stuff and picking out what we will both be buying very soon- I even got a Cabela's credit card! Look at me :) Since I am in Kentucky I am going to really embrace my time here. I am hoping to get involved in many outdoor activities here! I am excited for that-maybe some hunting, fishing, hiking, kayaking? The options are endless- unless its surfing. I felt pretty productive today too. I ordered all of my books for school, looked up future internships and even sent an email about job possibilities in the future (too early?) Well the early bird gets the worm right?

All in all, it turned out to be a great last day with my dad. He leaves tomorrow and I am not looking forward to that, but it has to happen at some point...or could my family move out here? Just kidding, kind of. I know I will get to see them soon!

On a side note, I know this blog can be vague at times, but the Internet world is crazy these days! I want to keep people updated but don't want strangers knowing details to my life. Feel free to text, call or comment if you want anymore information or anything specified!!! :)

Home Sweet Home

I am officially moved into my apartment in Louisville!

I feel like I should have let people know I made it sooner, but this journey has been even more bittersweet than I expected. I arrived in Louisville on Sunday and have been moving in since. Luckily, I was able to order and have the furniture for my room delivered the first day here! It was such a stress reliever to have that done. Yesterday I ordered and had a couch and dining room table delivered, and today my car arrived (we shipped it) and I was able to get it all unpacked and finalize my room. With those three big accomplishments and many many trips to Walmart and Target, I can happily say I am blogging from my fully furnished apartment in Louisville :)

Louisville is great. Different, but great. I think if my dad wasn't here I would have had a harder time adjusting. Unfortunately, he leaves on Friday. There are not a million difference between California and Louisville. I don't live in farm town, although the streets at night are so dark! I do live in a big city, there is lunchtime and after work traffic, there are a million of restaurants to eat at, there are a lot of similarities. I think the biggest difference in the two places are the people's attitudes. There are two main attitude types I have met here: the laid back, yet hospitable type, and the type who have terrible customer service. I'm sure there are more, I've been here less than a week. Don't get me wrong, I like it here. There is a lot to do and a lot to see and in these few days I have made a few major realization:

1. I cherish my family more than anything.

-This is something I have always known, but choosing to move away from them for another 4 years, to an even farther location is breaking my heart. I know they support me more than anyone, but right now I feel like I would give anything to have them out here for this experience with me, having big family dinners, laughing, joking and just being in each other's presence.

2. After school, I want to move back to San Diego.

-This is something I thought I would never want, but after this week it is all I want. Why wouldn't I want to start a career, raise a family, and spend a lifetime as close as I can be to the people who have helped shape my life, impacted me so positively and who I love more than anything? Exactly, so San Diego in 5 (hopefully 4) years it is. It is not that I don't like other places, but I want to be by my family.

3. Five years isn't THAT long.

-I am going to complain on this blog how long five years is. I am probably going to do it weekly. But in the grand scheme of things and where I will be at after I finish school, five years is a small piece of my life.

4. Communication is key

- I am far away from so many people I love, plus there is a 3 hour time difference. It's hard on everyone. But effort and communication are key. For example, I had a great conversation with a friend for two hours last night and at first it was hard to figure out when to call, but we made it work and it was an awesome conversation. And today, we text. When people are away from each other effort, intentionality, communication (and technology) really are key. This is something I plan to work on to help keep and build relationships.

Some of these were obvious, but they have impacted my week and my thinking. More than anything I realize what a huge blessing and role my family is in my life. And that my parents are basically my best friends at times. I don't know what I would do without them. I am really dreading my dad leaving. I feel like a little girl, but he is honestly the best guy I know. It will be hard without him. Shout out to you Dad and Mom and sorry for the long, somewhat depressing, ramble. (If you cried reading this, totally understandable, let it out.)

Besides the moving and the life epiphanies I also have been on the job search (and gotten a gym membership). I have been called for two interviews already and am going in to see if there is an opening at another place tomorrow. This is great news because I need some money if I want to be able to visit and enjoy all the cities and states in the South and Midwest- and go home to visit!

I have a week off before I start school. I am excited, but nervous for how tough it may be. I think it is going to be very hard and at first being away from my family is going to make things even harder. To be honest, I had an amazing summer. Part of me is wondering why I decided to come out here and move away from everything and everyone I know and love, but another part of me reminds myself that 5 years is not that long in the grand scheme of things (epiphany #3)  and it is for my best interest, it is going to better my future. Everyday I have to remind myself I am here for a reason, that time will pass fast and to have fun and enjoy this new adventure of life that I am starting. I am going to learn to love this new place I call home. 

Exciting News!

After some deliberation I finally decided to email transformations on bodybuilding.com (my new obsession) and send them my story. For those that do not know in the last couple of years I have lost around 30 or so pounds and dropped about 10% of body fat. I never really noticed that I was "big" so when everyone began bringing up how different I looked it came as a shock at first.

Anyways, bodybuilding.com chose my story and it will be featured on their site in about 3-4 months. They also gave me an online credit (they are so cool!) No, I am not here promoting them, I have just seen some great things they have done for my friends and me in the last few months.

I feel pretty proud and motivated more than anything. Be expecting lots of fitness ranting and workout rambling. Sorry, but I just love it! My big move is the new step into my fitness. I am planning on becoming really focused once this big move is over!

That is all for my my exciting news!

One Week Countdown!

My one week countdown until the big move was on Saturday, but it hasn't even set in that I only have less than a week left at home. The only time I realize that the move is happening soon is when I'm busy packing all my stuff (which is practically almost all done!) but I still feel like my time here isn't coming to a close yet. This past week I was so busy and had such a great time that I haven't even had a chance to feel sad about moving, which for me is a big deal.

My second to last week here was spent wonderfully. I was busy almost everyday. I caught up with a lot of old friends and, of course, spent a lot of time with my family. Sometimes I forget how many amazing people are in my life. Monday night I went to Baked Bear with some friends. Baked Bear is a new place in PB that has cookie ice cream sandwiches. It was delicious! And so bad for us! But we followed the million calories with a short walk on the beach that reminded me how beautiful my city is. San Diego will always be home to me no matter where I go.

On Wednesday I went to lunch with two girls I played basketball with and after went to watch their women's league. It was great to catch up with them and how our lives have changed some but stayed the same in some areas. I got to babysit one of my friends daughter during their game! And afterwards we all caught up for awhile. It made me realize that after I move I still need to keep in touch with people. I'm not always the best at that.

On Thursday I went horseback riding with my best friend! It was such a great time. I used to go horseback riding all the time and I love horses. Plus, it's so fitting to go horseback riding before I move to the state where the derby is!!



Thursday afternoon and Friday morning were spent in Palm Springs. My grandparents live there and I haven't made it out to visit as much as I should. Palm Springs is beautiful! I used to go there a lot when I was younger, but I don't ever remember appreciating how beautiful the mountains are. The desert really can be an amazing place. It was really great to spend sometime with my grandparents. We went to a street market and there was also a Marilyn Monroe costume contest. It was a nice chance to relax. We left Palm Springs Friday morning after a nice family breakfast and headed home for a relaxing night.


The weekend was also very packed with activities! Saturday my family went jet skiing again! It's always so much fun to have the whole family together out there. That night we went to Phil's BBQ to celebrate my boyfriend's birthday. We had a great time, ordered way too much delicious food and came home with happy, very full, bellies. Sunday was my boyfriend's birthday so we, of course, watched baseball...what else would we do? Before we left for the game my dad and I packed my whole car because it is being shipped this week. It felt great to get one big part of packing out of the way. After the packing we all took the trolley to the stadium, which is always such a fun part to me. The stadium was packed with Yankee fans, probably the most fans ever at a Padre's game. Our seats were right in the sun! It was so fun, but so hot!!


When we finally got home from the game we had our last big family dinner! My dad surprised me with crab for dinner! My family always loves a good feast. It was one of the best nights in awhile, with tons of delicious food and shark week to follow!!

My last week in town is just as packed as this one was. I have tons of dinner dates, a football game, packing to do and my family has a camping spot on the beach! It should be a great week to end my time in San Diego!